Healing with Master Plants and Ayahuasca

What to expect when working with Plant medicine?

The entire month was an energetic and emotional roller-coaster. Moments of freight and self-pity would alternate with periods of lightness and euphoria; then frustration, self-doubt, exhaustion, pain would overtake you followed shortly by trust and hope; sometimes you may feel all of these emotions in one single day.

Despite such intense moments, boredom would also set in at times, only to give birth to moments of confusion and then exaltation, enthusiasm and inspiration, a lightness and finally a joy of being that I have never experienced before in my life. As the days passed by and I surrendered gradually to the process, I became one with the surroundings; the spirit of the jungle started opening-up to me as my spirit opened-up to it. As I stare at the river storming down from my casita, I feel as if its waters are flowing though my veins.

Now about three weeks after the end of the dieta, I am still integrating the plants’ lessons. However, I know for sure that one part of me has died in the process; a part of me that was still delusional and too attached to how my life should be, went down the drains through the daily purging and cleansing of entire body. There were days when I felt the plants doing through every single cell of my body and drained my body of all energy while rinsing them of toxins and other impurities.

I am now see myself more as a spirit and consider my body and my mind as perfect gifts given to me, the soul, to experience life, to learn and to grow. The plants showed me without a doubt that all life is governed by an all-encompassing intelligence; and they taught me how to surrender my ego to that larger intelligence and follow its guidance in order to bring harmony into my life.

How does Ayahuasca work?

The first evening after our arrival at the retreat Garden of Peace we have done a tabaco purge in order to cleans our body from toxins. As I swallow the half glass of tabaco tincture I feel its punching taste burning my throat and my intestines. My stomach clinched and started aching with the five litters of water I needed to drink in a very short time. My whole body started shivering and for few moments I questioned the entire process and felt sorry for myself. But soon after throwing-up I felt a quiet lightness enveloping my entire body. Shortly after I fell into a deep sleep, despite the fright of being alone at night in the jungle.

The second night already we did the first ayahuasca ceremony. Gathered all in the Maloka (ceremony temple) we would all drink one small glass of ayahuasca vein liquid.

The thick dark liquid gave me nauseous but for more than an hour or so, nothing else happened. All lights were switched off and complete darkness filled the entire space. I felt so alone and isolated, surrounded only by the sounds of the jungle that was waking up with the falling of the darkness. But very soon after the Shaman started to sing the Ikaros, an invisible entity seemed to have taken hold of my body; pretty soon I would loose almost all control over my body that felt like a jelly fish in the grip of that entity – which I knew was ayahuasca; scared, my mind started to fight desperate to regain some control; and then horror kicked in. Visions of dragons and creatures with several tails and huge teeth started roaring in front of my closed eyes. I open my eyes to evade the creatures and the space seems to be filled with a dense dark midst, crossed by golden dancing patterns. Then everything became complete darkness again. Desperate, my mind started to devise plans of escape, almost convinced that someone was trying to kill me. The reasons according to my scared mind, were plenty. I tried to get up and walk out of the Maloka and this is when I realized that my body would not listen to me. Finally I ask for help and someone helped walk outside; she gave me a mapacho and that seemed to help me found some ground. But the  ayahuasca vein was still very strong inside my body and she would come and go in waves taking full charge of my body and mind; sweat was going down my whole body as I was oscillating between surrender and struggle. After several hours of “fighting”, the grab of the vein on me weakened and slowly I started to recover some control. It would take however more than twelve hours for the vein to leave my body completely. The intense paranoia I felt during the ceremony would take more than twenty four hours to leave me. Only afterwards I started to make sense and understand the messages of the plants.

I then intuitively knew that the horrifying creatures I had seen during the Ayahuasca ceremony represented my own darkness, my own emotional baggage that I had not been able to let go of, despite more than fifteen years of inner work. The plants were showing me in a very plastic way and within short period of time what I have been doing to myself along many years of life.

Healing with Master Plants

As of the third day, I started working with the Master Plants. Every morning you drink half-glass tea like liquid prepared by the Shaman from various plants, according to a traditional recipe. The effects of the Master Plants are much more subtle, with no psychedelic properties. Their work however is more profound and the healing process takes longer. That is why the nutritious diet is stricter when one works with Master Plants in addition to the Ayahuasca. The food served during the entire month was pretty bland, with no salt, sugar or fat of any kind. I was also recommended to spend most of the time alone, in the jungle casita and connect with the nature around. The purpose of the Master Plants dieta is to build a relationship with the plants.

During one month, I would take three different plants, most powerful of which was Ciric Sanango. Within fifteen minutes of drinking the tea, almost my entire body became numb. At moments I felt pain everywhere as the plant used almost all my energy in the process of washing away emotional and physical toxins. All I could do was to curl in my bed staring at the trees surrounding my casita; every now and then I would rush to toilet to purge the garbage the plant has had collected from my cells. It was only when I took the last cup of Ciric Sanango without feeling any of these effects that I understood the cleansing was done.

The integration process after Dieta

The work with psychedelics and master plants is very intimate and individual. At the Garden of Peace I felt very supported logistically and emotionally. The place in the deep jungle, away from the city, with two small rivers traversing the temple area, is perfect for isolation and deep connection with nature.

The Shaman and facilitators were available for support or questions almost at all times. However, in the visions you are all alone; no one can see or witness what you do, no one can understand your trip better than you. The entire journey is intimately related to your emotions, feelings, perspectives on life and you alone will be able to make sense of everything that comes to you through the visions. It is important therefore to trust the process and trust that somehow, through intuition, through reflection and meditation, you will get the messages the plants are conveying to you.

The post-dieta healing process

Although it has been more than three weeks since the end of my dieta, I am still processing the lessons. The post-dieta – no pork, no alcohol, no chili and no sex – will end thirty days after the end the dieta. However, the healing process may continue longer than that. My connection with the plants is still very strong. Nature has never been more soothing for me. But most of all, I feel a stronger connection to an all encompassing force or maybe intelligence, that knows it all. My job now it to fine-tune this connection and surrender completely to my new journey down the rabbit whole. My values are shifting slowly and I feel like an urge to deepen my connection to that all-encompassing intelligence. I started to experience synchronicities and every time they happen I know each on is a confirmation that I am on the right path.

My challenge now is to stay focus on the process and continuing integrating the plants' messages!